Monday, September 15, 2014

Finding my art

Today I heard the beautiful phrase:  Your art is what makes you come alive.  What a beautiful concept.  #3's art is creating with Legos.  He makes all sort of crazy things, like tiny vacuum cleaners and cameras.  It's pretty darn cute.  His brothers, on the other hand, still enjoy using Legos as a road block to watch demolition as they run Hot Wheels into them.  Such loud little people.

My art isn't traditional;  drawing, painting and sculpting aren't strong suits.  I love music and I do well enough, but I wouldn't win American Idol.  I sang a solo last night at church and did a good job.  My aim was to share a beautiful song with my church family and I did it.  But it's not what makes me come alive.

I come alive in the beauty of Spanish.  The way the words flow, how the syntax comes together perfectly and the lovely sounds of the pure vowels.  For me, it's an art form.  I'm enjoying teaching it and sharing my passion with children.

Another art form for me is connecting with others.  #3 asked me last week why the flags were at half mast.  I told him in simple terms it was because of 9/11.  Today he brought it up again and said he didn't like 9/11.  I told him I don't either, but God is bigger than any evil in this world.  We had a neat talk about that.  Even though I wouldn't have chosen that topic, that moment was art.

Last week we began a new MOPs year.  I am a small group discussion leader.  It's been a few years since I've had that job and it's nice to see that I've grown since before.  When I did it before, I had in my mind what a perfect leader would do and I would feel so defeated that I couldn't be perfect even though I gave all I had.

Now, I realize that perfect is an illusion.  God called me to be faithful in all I do, not perfect.  As I write this, laundry needs to be folded.  A "perfect" mom would be doing that instead of this.  However, my husband will be home before long and this is my way to recharge.  Sifting through my feelings by writing is a way for me to create art and refresh my spirit.  Folding laundry will get done later.  It's not art.  Necessary, but not art.

Last weekend, I sat and watched Pride and Prejudice and loved every luxurious moment of it.  Today I had the chance to enjoy a cup of coffee and a wonderful new book.  Those moments are good.  With all the busy swirling around me, I love that I can finally be at a place where I know I deserve time for myself and I'm brave enough to take it.

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